Saturday, July 29, 2006

Today.. Today.. Today..!

Random phrase 1 -- 心 如 直 水


It's been a tiring day..
FYP garnered disappointing results.
I was bewildered with certain things..


Couldn't complete my tasks for the day.
Only managed to finish the FYP by 1530hr.
My class at Suntec was scheduled at 1545hr.
Mission impossible.
1540hr I alighted from 179 just outside pioneer road exit, wanting to get a cab.
Feeling so damn rushed, and by the time I fetch a cab and reach Suntec...
My 45 minutes class would only be left with 15 minutes or lesser?
Disappointing.
I called to postpone.
It was kinda my last chance to postpone.
Next lesson, Sunday 6pm. Please nothing happens for this!


I went ahead to Joshua Research Consultants straight away instead.
Did a near 3.5hour phonecall survey about Singapore HeritageFest..
God knows what it is about..
Oh well... 7 surveys...
My throat was super dry and was famished...
Probably that's why I didn't really want to talk at the later part of the night...


I was supposed to reach Joshua Research Consultant early...
But I was being helpful to some girl by the road...
Cos she asks if I could help her do a short survey or what..
5 minutes only!
I was like.. I'm early, why not?
As a result.. I was late.. WTF!!
Then another girl also "attended" me..
We went up to an escalator..
blah blah blah..
Stood on the weighing scale...
Measure the fat percentage and blah blah blah...
Thanks for reminding me of my fats and blah blah blah...
And thanks for keeping me back and making waste my time..

Ok.. I'm fat fat fat fat fat...
No need to praise me things like...
"Ley hou leng ah..."
"Your eyes are so pretty..."
2 girls attend to me right?! They will 一 唱 一 和 ...
A says: "See see!! Her limbs are soooo small!! (not chubby lah..)"
B says: "Wah.. Smaller than mine!!! You sure can slim down more than me..."
blah blah blah...

See my weight.. then they say...
"哇 !看 不 出 你 有 这 么 重 !"
I feel so argh!!!!!!!!!
But smilingly I said.. "看 不 出 hor?!"
They are so happy and said... 对 lor....
DAMN THEM!!
I hate it! Stop targetting me!!!
I will never eat replacement meals..
They taste and look like shit, for goodness' sake!!

Okay.. What's my ideal weight?! 48kg.. That's OMG...
That's my weight when I had food poisoning cum gastric...



Butter Factory was cancelled...
As a result, we went chilling at Jazz Bar at Boat Quay..
I felt that there was too much conversation...
Didn't really enjoy relaxing...
Most of the time, I didn't know what jokes I am laughing at...
And probably didn't know what I am talking most of the time too...
Mostly crap and rubbish as usual...



Random Phrase 2 -- 一 片 空 白



不 想 想 太 多 ， 不 想 感 觉 太 多 。
我 多 么 希 望 我 不 是 一 个 有 血 有 肉 的 人 类 。
做 一 个 没 有 性 别 、 没 有 情 感 的 东 西 ... ...
在 自 己 该 表 现 的 范 围 内 ， 发 出 所 长 ... ...
老 了 、 陈 旧 了 、 没 价 值 了 过 后 ， 就 被 淘 汰 、 被 遗 弃 ... ...
从 此 以 后 ， 就 跟 着 岁 月 的 流 失 ， 被 遗 忘 掉 了 。
好 悲 哀 的 想 法 啊 !

但 这 样 子 不 是 也 蛮 好 的 吗 ?
少 了 情 情 爱 爱 、 少 了 贪 念 、 少 了 永 不 知 足 的 贪 念 ... ...
少 了 的 好 处 固 然 多 得 不 胜 枚 举 ， 但 是 若 你 没 尝 试 过 快 乐 、 你 就 不 会 懂 得 悲 伤 。

若 人 得 永 远 被 情 感 给 束 缚 着 ... ...
那 ... 活 着 还 有 意 义 ?


那 句 "不 在 乎 天 长 地 久 ， 只 在 乎 曾 经 拥 有 "
都 是 骗 人 !!
对 两 个 相 爱 的 人 ， 这 只 不 过 是 在 安 慰 、 安 抚 双 方 的 花 言 巧 语 ... ...
有 时 候 不 曾 拥 有 可 能 好 过 拥 有 过... ...
却 又 心 知 杜 明 、 知 道 眼 前 的 一 切 都 是 短 暂 的 。
我 想 这 才 是 最 痛 苦 的 。
早 知 今 日 ， 何 必 当 初 ?

有 时 候 明 知 是 个 错 误 ， 还 一 头 灾 下 去 ...
这 又 何 必 呢 ?


Probably I should start to be more reserved to myself?
Maybe I should go back to my little dark corner and hide myself there...

This week is a week that I hate to be in school.
Cos it's convocation week..
It ouches to be asked why I am still here...
It ouches even more that someone love to mention the word 'Long service award" and some others ask about why I am still here..
It is even more absurd if non-engineering students think that their course is the most difficult course in NTU, (more difficult than engineering subjects) and that they don't understand why we are here so long.. Such people are definitely superficial and childish!!
It ouches.. that I'm still in here...
It ouches when the two most looked-forward modules for me turned up to be a flop...
Lousy IA.. and non-interesting FYP...

Susan's life.. is just a disaster...

sugary sweet savouring @ 2:41 AM |



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