Sunday, April 08, 2007

Finally.. There's no longer shadows..

Reading my past year's post..
I realised.. It's been too long... emo-ing and draggy...

From the start of being told 'you got competition'
Till competition was eliminated, but I wasn't informed of..
Till there was love, but I was unaware of..
Till what went wrong since December..
Till suspicions grew in me, and got me into a turmoil...
Till now, truth is unveiled....



Now...
Decision, not mine to make..
In a way, good.
Memories are too fantastic to make anything sour between us.
At least, there's no regrets and we left with no pricks or hard feelings...
Now, I still live my life as how he motivated me to be.
Though I cancelled my last lesson with Music Clef and stopped totally at the moment..
It's just a small break, and I will be sure that I will pick it up from there in a while's time.

As what he always said...
Looking forward to present and future tense, and not into past tense.

I am still motivated, and still aimed to continue to do him proud.
Proud of me, not only in my piano, but in all other aspects of life..
Cos we both are simple, just want the best for each other.




Something that I read from Simon's blog..
And for the first time, the entry, as what he said, makes sense.

"if you are together with someone that brings you memories of another person that you hate or detest, you'll always end up fighting that shadow and it'll never work out."

I'm glad that I'm out of this. Finally.
And hooray. Intense emo entries had met their expiry dates!!
Cos fighting that shadow of suspicions, and no status, hence never wanted to talk about it..
Was definitely a torturous thing.
Me and my friends had never witnessed such intense emo in my blog..
Expired. Done.
It's such a great relief!!!






God is fair, shows us truth, and not taking sides of anyone.
The girls involved are never in the wrong.
A clear conscience. I've never done any wrong in this matter.
I am never the one who caused hell.
Anyone with clear mind, and objective about this matter, knows.

God have finally shone light at the shadow overcast...
Yesterday session was enlightening, seeking peace..
Jerald asked. "Why of all days, you chose to come on the longest session in the whole year?"
I didn't choose to. It's probably been pre-arranged.
No one brought me. I strong-headedly tagged along with Janice.
I'm glad that I had went for it.




Going back to the old school grounds that late at night..
I told Janice, "This is where we played table tennis..."
And actually.. table tennis is how we met and brought us this friendship..
Good memories are the ones that keep us happy and move on everyday.



All is not lost.
Withdrawing from the Aussie trip doesn't sound too bad at all..
I gained more trips in return.
New plans came just like that..
I'm going Taiwan, Batam, Bintan (maybe)...
And most importantly... I should be going Aussie in July/August!!!
It'll also be a 2-week thing...

Which means.. I probably want to take a longer break before starting to work for good...
*grins*

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